Posted in life update, Weight Loss

This is NOT a new year, new me post.

I’ve done them in years past, but I’m not going to do that this year. Instead, its more of a new year, continuing on with what I was doing late last year, me. Not as catchy, I will admit, but I feel its more accurate. I rejoined weight watchers, or WW as its been re-branded into, in October, last year. I initially joined as a workshop and digital member, but in December, the majority of the classes in my town were closed. So, because of that, I was able to cancel my subscription, and rejoined a day later, at the end of december as an online (or digital) member only.

The good thing about that is that I kept the same details so the record of my weight loss was there, I hadn’t weighed in for most of december as I’d been ill, and to be completely honest, very demotivated with weight watchers in general. So I weighed myself my first day as an online member, and I was very pleased to note that I had lost 4 and a half pounds in December. Which was a surprise, a welcome one.

In March, 2018 I weighed my heaviest I’ve ever weighed. I stepped on the scales and let out such a scream my mum came running up the stairs thinking I’d hurt myself. She caught me about to drop kick the scales in a fit of shock-based pique. Cooler heads prevailed and the scales survived to live another day. Since then, I have lost 2 stones, 1 and a half pounds or 29.5 pounds. That has been slow, but a lot of the time I wasn’t actively trying to do anything about my weight, so I am pleased with my progress.

On a health front, I had my gallbladder removed on the 20th of September last year. It took me about a month to completely recover, but I did and now things are mostly okay. I say mostly because its left me with a few issues. One being that my system now can’t tolerate any dairy whatsoever. When I was having issues with my gallbladder, dairy was a big trigger for my gallbladder flaring up and causing me pain. I stopped eating dairy entirely, and after my operation, I tried to reintroduce dairy back into my diet and it was a disaster. Major stomach upset, bloating, nausea, you name it, I had it. So now, I am completely dairy free and because of my blood pressure, I am now totally caffeine free and mostly salt free.

I am a joy when going out for a meal, let me tell you. No, in all seriousness, eating out isn’t a problem, most places are accommodating. Its just annoying, having to be extremely picky and I know, at times it annoys my mum, but I have to be careful otherwise within ten to twenty minutes I have, oh no, I have five seconds to find a toilet or else, kind of upset stomach. Imodium has become a good friend. Usually just taking one will stop most of it, if I’m out of the house.

So, the plan is, I’m going to keep on doing what I’ve been doing, eating better and exercising more and hopefully, slowly and surely my weight will keep coming down. The past couple of weeks, I’ve gained and lost the same quarter of a pound, which is fine by me, as I’m its my time of the month, and I’ve been bloated and uncomfortable so, we’ll see what the future brings.

Posted in life update, Weight Loss

Back on Track, Finally.

So, its been about three months since I last updated here and its fair to say that all the predictions I made and plans I put forth in my last post, didn’t happen. I stuck to the plan and kept losing weight for a few weeks, then in may, I kept putting on and losing the same three pounds. So, my desire to keep going was at a low, then at the end of June, the wheels fell off. I had put on eight and a half pounds in three weeks and then at that point, I gave up completely. I didn’t weigh myself or stick to plan or do anything really for four or five weeks.

So, I decided on Monday it was more than time for me to get back on track and stop eating so much crap that was making me feel like crap, but worse than that, was constantly triggering both my gallbladder and my eczema. So, I bit the bullet and got back on the scales and much to my shock and delight, found out that I’d stayed the same.

Which currently leaves me two pounds lighter than I was when I started with WW at the start of April. Now, having said that, I am still twenty pounds lighter than I was at my heaviest and that, I am proud about.

So, in the air of turning over a new leaf, as we are no longer gym members (as we were paying for it and not using it) I have made exercise a priority this week. I’m not going crazy with it. I realise at the minute my fitness level is low, so I’ve been walking. Tuesday I went for a walk after dinner because it was a beautiful night, and we walked about three miles. Yesterday, I went for a walk mid-morning, and it was a beautiful walk but by the time I got home, I was drenched with sweat as it was a hot day. A cool shower and a change of clothes and that was me sorted.

I’m back to eating three meals a day, and after three days, I can definitely feel the difference in my energy levels. Another thing that’s helping me is that the scales are out of sight in the bathroom. I know where they are but if I don’t see them, I don’t think about them. My aim is to only weigh myself once a week, on a monday. Nothing more, before I was weighing myself everyday which isn’t helpful, as everyone’s weight naturally fluctuates during the week. So, I’ll do my best this week and see what the result brings on Monday. Got plans to go for a walk tonight before dinner and tomorrow during the day, weather permitting.

I’m feeling happier than I have for a while, now that I’m actively trying to get a handle on my health again. No big plans, this is a slow and steady marathon. I have a long, LONG, way to go before I get to my goal, whatever that’s going to be. At the minute I have no idea what that’s going to be, i’m going to let how I feel in my body be the guide, not the weight on the scale. I’ve given myself until my 40th birthday to lose as much of this weight as I can, which as of today is 2 years and 2 and a half months away. So plenty of time to lose weight and get fit.

Posted in Gym Life, Weight Loss

Weight Loss, Gym Life and Hellboy, oh my!

So, I had my weekly weigh in yesterday, and I’ve lost another 2 and a half pounds which takes my total lost in 2 weeks to seven pounds which I am very, very happy with. That also takes the amount of weight I’ve lost since Feb 2018 to 24 lbs, (Or 1 stone 10 lbs, or 10.8 kilos.)

I was supposed to have my induction to the gym yesterday, but my mum has issues with her back, and it was really sore, so we rescheduled it for this morning. Just in time to get a message from my friend, asking if I wanted to go to Frankie & Benny’s and to the cinema to see Hellboy with her and her son. Which I jumped at. The food was delicious, and I ordered Macaroni Cheese with a wince (and my fingers crossed, but today I’m fine, no issues with my gallbladder whatsoever). I didn’t really think about points, if I’m being honest, I just ordered what I really wanted, something I hadn’t had in months. Also, having a treat once in a blue moon isn’t going to ruin my life, so I just drew a line under it and went on.

We went to see Hellboy, and as vue has changed their prices, it now only costs me £5, which is an added bonus. As to the actual film itself, eh, it wasn’t bad. I’m not a film critic, nor am I a snob when it comes to films. I really enjoyed the Guillermo Del Toro version, and to me, the remake doesn’t have the same feel, or the same magic, but it was okay. Not overwhelmingly brilliant, but I wasn’t bored.

I went to the gym this morning for my induction, took about 25 minutes. Nothing terribly exciting, if you’ve been to one gym, pretty much they’re all the same. I wanted to stay and get a workout in but mum had other plans, so we just left after our induction. We’re going in the morning, not sure what time. If mum wants to swim when I go to the gym, then its going to be an eight o’clock start at the gym as the kids are on holidays this week and from 9.30 onward, the swimming pool is busy all day. If she just wants to go to the gym, then it’ll be later. Honestly, I’m not bothered what time we go, we’ll probably walk there and then get my dad to give us a lift back. Once I’ve been going to the gym a while and built up my fitness and stamina I’ll start walking back from the gym as that’s what I used to do, walk there and back.

I’m looking forward to getting on with my workouts and start going to the gym more often. Being unemployed, I can go the gym whatever time suits me, and that means that I can avoid the busy times as much as possible. I’m aiming to go three times a week to start with, the last thing I want to do is go too hard too fast and end up injuring myself.

Posted in life update, Weight Loss

Steps in the right direction

Went for a lovely walk this afternoon with my mum. We walked along the canal near our house, to the local floral hall/botanic gardens (I never know what to call it, tbh.)

Our beautiful Canal, just a short walk from my house.
One of the flowers on view at the botanical gardens/floral hall

While we were out, we also went and rejoined the gym. It’s run by the local council and is really affordable. It’s £31 a month, and that’s a family pass, which is two adults and two kids, and since we don’t have any kids in our family, its just me and mum going.

I’m excited about rejoining the gym, and we have our induction tomorrow night at 6pm. I also weigh in tomorrow morning, which is going to be a bit of a weird one this week. I have no idea how my weight loss is going to go because its my TOTM right now, so I could stay the same, lose a pound… I have no idea.

My induction and going to the gym is exciting and this time, I’m going to be aware of 4 things.

  1. I am spectacularly unfit right now.
  2. I am at the beginning of my fitness journey.
  3. I am going to look like a tomato. That’s fine.
  4. Prepare to suck for the first couple of months.

Having done this in the past, I know that when I go to the gym combined with weight watchers I can lose weight, and do it well. This time I am super determined to lose my weight. I want to be the healthiest, happiest, fittest version of myself I can be. I’d love to say once I lose weight, I’m going to look like Helena Christiansan’s twin, but lets be realistic here. I just want to be the best version of me I can be. And anything else, well, that’ll just be an added bonus.

so. much. THIS. I believe this with all my heart.
Posted in life update, Weight Loss

Going down the right road.

So, I weighed in on Monday, and I had lost four and a half pounds my first week on WW. I was over the moon, and still am, to be honest. I didn’t feel hungry, I felt in total control of what I was eating and what I was doing, and if I had questions or needed something checked, the app is a life saver. It has bar code scanning built in (which isn’t 100% but works 85% of the time, it obviously can’t have every item of food ever made on there) and that’s been a big help too. For me, its either a case of ‘x product is really low in points, oooh, i’m having that’ or ‘they want what? Nope, not doing it.’

I tend to think about my points as money, I always have. This may sound odd, but bear with me. I get 29 points a day, so if I look at a sauce to go over some pasta and its 18 points for a jar, I’m not going to spend 18 of the 29 I’ve got for the whole day on one thing. That doesn’t make sense. For that amount of points, I could make an entire meal, and have a yoghurt for pudding. So, the lower the points, the less I have to spend, the more likely I am to go with it. Having said that, if I really want something and its higher in points, I’ll have it and work it out, that’s the beauty of the program, at least for me.

Another level of awkwardness to the whole thing is that I am completely dairy free. So it makes copying recipes somewhat complicated because, in my experience, dairy free cheese doesn’t react the same as ‘normal’ cheese, when it comes to melting and stuff. And I’m not going to lie, I really really REALLY miss my usual strong mature cheddar. Unfortunately, even after I get my gall bladder out, whenever that will be, I still have to go light on the dairy because my eczema is triggered by dairy. Sigh. My life is so much fun right now.

I’m slowly trying to build up my fitness and go at least three times a week for a walk. This week, I’ll be honest, bar walking around town yesterday, I haven’t done any major exercise, I am absolutely choked with the cold, feeling disgusting and have zero energy. So, for right now, I’m a slug sat on my chair with my laptop. I’ve got an appointment tomorrow afternoon so I’m going to at least try to walk one way, which is about half an hour walk, so that’ll help exercise-wise. I’m struggling today because I genuinely have no appetite but I need to eat so that I can take painkillers.

So, I’ll aim to write again later this week, I’m trying as hard as I can to keep up the two to three times a week schedule I’ve set for myself.

Posted in life update, Weight Loss

A Fork In The Road

It seems like every year I renew my blog, ready to be a more prolific writer and be organised and post here often. And then, I go months without posting anything. This is something I want to change. In fact, there’s a lot of things I want to change.

One of the more recent changes I made on Sunday (31/3/19) I decided to stop going to Slimming World and go back to Weight Watchers. I tried SW for 12 weeks, which is what I’d agreed with my mum when I started. I got on fine over the first few weeks but then, in a familiar pattern, I fall out of love with the program.

It’s not a dig at SW, its a good program and is helping a lot of people meet their goals and live healthy lives, it just wasn’t a good fit for me. Weight Watchers, or WW, as its been re-branded, works for me. I know this program, I know what I’m doing, and best of all, I’m comfortable.

I still have the same determination to lose weight. I don’t want to do any more damage to my body than I have already. I’m 37, and I’ve been overweight for the majority of my life up to this point. Well, no more. No more struggling to breathe walking a steep hill, having sore knees and hips and permanent back ache.

That’s not even mentioning the health benefits of my losing weight. I have an under-active thyroid and Poly Cystic Ovarian Syndrome, both of which would be improved by my losing even 10% of my body weight. I also have chronic depression, which is a entire situation all by itself, but for right now is being managed very well.

Also, over the past couple of years I’ve had recurring issues with my gallbladder. I’ve been back and forward to the doctor and a few weeks ago, I had an endoscopy, as the surgeon wanted to find out if my symptoms could be being caused by an ulcer. It wasn’t, and I’ve got an appointment at the end of this month to see him again, to hopefully get my operation scheduled. Or, being more realistic since this is the NHS, get onto the waiting list for my operation. Apparently the area I live in has a large waiting list for gallbladder operations and I’m being unemployed and mostly broke, I’m not in the position to go private for my operation.

So, I am currently on day four of my first week, and I’m feeling good. I’m actually back to eating three meals a day, I need to work on not eating so much carbs, in terms of pasta and bread, and figuring out what to eat instead. And, I need to eat more salad and veg. Which again, not a chore, love veg, as long as no one asks me to eat either sprouts or cauliflower. I am also completely dairy free as it sets off my gall bladder, and its not worth the pain.

I’ve also discovered at 37, having had eczema since I was 6 weeks old, that dairy triggers my eczema. Something no-one had ever mentioned to me until I saw a doctor a few months ago, and she suggested it. It was when I cut dairy out of my diet due to my gallbladder that I felt the difference and even just a small bit of dairy causes the skin on the back of my hands and my lower arms to flare and feel tight and painful. As I discovered a couple of hours ago, when I had toast with soft cheese, and my hands are sore now. So, now I have to figure out if there is a non-disgusting dairy free low fat soft cheese. Just typing that makes my nose wrinkle. I hate food experiments, but unfortunately, I don’t have a choice. Its just a case of trying what’s out there until i find something that a – is palatable and b – I actually enjoy. Who knows if such a thing exists but I guess I’ll find out the next time I go shopping.

From now on, I am determined to post at least 3 times a week, and hopefully that should be easy to do. I guess we’ll see.

Posted in life update, Weight Loss

Week 4

This week hasn’t gone the way I planned. I originally planned to put this post up on Friday, but I had a bout of food poisoning, so that plan went out the window. I am never ordering another take away pizza as long as I live. I’ll stick to making my own from now on.

I put on a pound this week, but I was expecting that due to it being my time of the month, and I can put on anything up to about five pounds because I bloat so badly. I knew going into it that I was going to put on weight, so I wasn’t upset. I was glad it was only a pound as to be perfectly honest I hadn’t been 100% on plan this week, but I’d say I’d been 90% so it wasn’t anything massive.

This week, going into week 5 hasn’t been brilliant, food poisoning is never the way I want to start my week, especially since I had to cancel my two days away after a couple of hours. Food poisoning and travelling do not mix. Trust me. I spent most of yesterday asleep instead of all the walking around I had planned so I’m going to go for a walk tomorrow to make up the difference.

Another thing that’s changing is that I made the decision, with my mum, to go back and rejoin the gym. We’re both interested in trying yoga. I want to work on my flexibility as its not as good as it should be. I can’t touch my toes, in fact, the nearest I can get is my shins and my calves absolutely scream. Also, with the gym we join, when you join, you can use the pool, the gym and do as many classes you want a week. I’m not a huge fan of swimming, I get too self conscious.

I love the gym, however and that’s my plan for right now. Building up my fitness is my main priority. I’ve never been the fittest person but with not working and going out and about, its gotten worse. When I get fitter and lose some more weight, I’m going to look at going to Zumba and body combat classes. Right now, I’m just working on slowly and surely building up my fitness by going for walks.

So, my plan for the next few days until I get weighed on Thursday is

  • Go out for a walk every day, at least half an hour.
  • Drink at least 2 litres of water a day
  • Eat more fruit and veg, think about speed food.
  • No more indulging in things that aren’t good for me.

I’m still feeling confident, I just need to go back to writing down everything I eat as I eat it, because that helps me be accountable to myself.

Posted in Weight Loss

Week 3

This morning was my week three weigh in, and I lost 3 pounds which means I’ve lost ten in three weeks. I am over the moon, I was happy with the thought I’d probably lost a pound and a half, which is generally what I’m aiming for. So to lose double that was a surprise.

This week I’ve increased my exercise, just by walking more, or when I walk going a longer route. I walked 17 miles this week, which I didn’t plan on, it just happened. I wear a fitbit and it is great for keeping track of everything for me. Walking at the minute can be a bit challenging as its been cold, snowy and slippy under foot but I persevere. I don’t think I’m ever going to be one of those people who gets up at 6am and goes for a walk with a smile on my face, but I don’t mind walking and hopefully the more weight I lose, the fitter I get, the more I’ll be able to exercise.

Both myself and my mum are doing slimming world, which has been a huge help having her there with me. At the minute we’re both considering rejoining our local gym, which is run by the council. Its £30 a month for a family group, which is 2 adults and 2 children. There are no children, so it’ll just be me and mum. Its not one of these ultra modern sleek gyms with all the fancy gadgets and high tech gear, but I wouldn’t go into those kind of gyms anyway because they’re usually filled with super fit, slim people. I’m neither slim nor particularly fit which is why my local gym fits me so well because you see a wide range of sizes of people. From the slim and fit, or ripped and fit, to people my size and larger. Its a welcoming place.

I want to up my exercise and also, having gone to the gym before whilst losing weight, I know the two in tandem can help. So, we’ll see. Maybe in a few weeks when I feel fitter. For now, I’m just going to concentrate on keeping up my walking. Its free, good for me and low impact.

I’m also pleased with my weight loss because this week proved to me that I can do things and live my life, while sticking (mostly) to plan, and still lose weight. I had a pizza last thursday, but it was the new range dominos do, which is very thin crust, light on the amount of sauce, low fat cheese and healthy toppings. Its 30 syns for a small, which for me is 2 days syns, or 15 of one day and three a day for five days depending on how I want to do it. I also went out for a meal on Sunday, with family and my friend and her son. I had a steak, baked potato and side salad. It was delicious and within plan. Then I had a ice cream. Which wasn’t on plan, but once it was done, I drew a line under it and that was it. I had it, I enjoyed it. I moved on.

I feel confident that I can keep going the way I have. I love my class, they’re all so supportive and my leader is lovely and friendly. I have a lot to lose, in all honesty, probably about eight stone (112lb/51kg) to lose, or there abouts. But for right now, I don’t look at the big picture, there’s no point. I just focus on the each 7 pound and let the big picture take care of itself. Right now, having lost 10, I have 4 pounds to my next stone mark. I have a pound and I’ll be under the next stone bracket and 9 pound to my interim target, which was 21lbs and 16 pounds to my club 10.

Feeling happy, confident and ready to tackle the next week coming.

Posted in Weight Loss

Introductions

So, I figured I would use today’s post to introduce myself properly.  Reading over the last post I realised that although I gave some information about me, I didn’t introduce myself. One, because it honestly didn’t occur to me, being totally sleep deprived and Two, blogging from my tablet is a nightmare, and I won’t be doing it again. Wow, the mobile keyboard is annoying for trying to type out posts.  I’ll stick to my laptop for blogging.   I need my qwerty keyboard.

So, introductions.  My name is Alison, I live in Scotland and I’m 37. And for as long as I can remember, I’ve thought I was fat. I remember deciding I wanted to lose weight when I was about ten. Which isn’t healthy, but my best friend was tiny and skinny, and I constantly compared myself to her. Looking back, especially at my teenage years makes me want to pull my hair out. Yes, I was curvy and maybe a stone (14lbs/6.5kg) overweight. I looked amazing and I thought I was fat because I was surrounded by people who, to me, were slimmer and prettier than me. That’s an issue I’ve dealt with my entire life and to be perfectly honest its still something I struggle with today.

But, weirdly enough, not when it comes to going to Slimming World. I don’t compare myself to everyone else in class because everyone’s journey is unique. Some only have a stone to lose, some have a lot more. I’m more on the ‘a lot more’ end of the scale but that’s okay. Rome wasn’t built in a day. I want to be at target, whatever that might be. At the moment, I have no main target, I’m just taking it seven pounds at a time.

I joined weight watchers for the first time when I was fourteen, against the wishes of my mum, but with my GP’s permission. I was too young, and it was a bad idea but trying telling any teenager who is convinced that they’re right what they’re doing is a mistake. So, after a few weeks I gave up. And over the next few years I put on a lot of weight. And I’ve spent the last twenty years trying to take it off again, with varying degrees of success.

As I said in my first post, my health issues have been my biggest struggle when it came to losing weight. Particularly my mental health because when my depression is bad, I am a comfort eater and all I want is junk. Doughnuts, crisps, chocolate, you name it, I’ll eat it. But since I’ve been on my latest anti depressants, that hasn’t been an issue. Also, with being dairy free, the amount of cakes I’m willing to eat has dropped. 90% of the dairy free cakes I’ve found have been less than tasty.

Slimming World is going great guns, I got weighed this morning and I’ve lost another 2 pounds. So I got my shiny sticker for my book, and my first half stone certificate. I am so happy with losing half a stone in two weeks. Its got me off to a great start and I feel confident about going on. I made the decision to pay for a 12 week block, which means, if I’ve paid for it, I’m going. I have no intention of giving up, this is the best I’ve felt in a long while. The next thing to do is take measurements and photos, so I can track my progress.

I set a target for losing 3 pounds this week, which feels like something I can achieve. So my aims for the week ahead are:

  • eat more fruit and veg (aka speed food)
  • drink more fluid, aim for 6 glasses a day
  • walk at least 30 mins three times this week.

All little goals, all achievable. All going to be done.

Posted in Weight Loss

The Journey Begins

Here I am, two weeks into 2019 and almost 2 weeks into my lifestyle change.  Sounds fancier than saying trying to lose weight, but at the heart of it, that’s what I’m doing. I joined Slimming World at the start of Jan, so I’ve had one weigh in, where I lost 5lbs and I get weighed again thursday morning.  So far, this is the most positive I’ve felt because this is the easiest by far I’ve found a weight loss plan. No weighing or measuring (or, more accurately, minimal weighing and measuring), no points, no calorie counting, no disgusting shakes.  Just eating lovely food, and enjoying myself.

I’m not going to go into the plan too much because in this post, that’s not what I want to focus on.   Losing weight is one of the aims for this year, the other is to get fit and healthy.  My health at the minute isn’t brilliant,  but it could be a lot worse.  I’m waiting on an operation to remove my gallbladder and because of that, i have some dietary restrictions. No dairy, eggs or fatty meats or anything overly greasy, unless i want to spend the next few days in a lot of pain.  I also have an underactive thyroid and poly cystic ovarian syndrome, both of which make losing weight extra challenging.

The biggest struggle in my life is my mental health, which needs a seperate post to explain everything.  Right now everything is good. I’m on meds and feeling good, after a rocky year of changing my meds, and feeling overall pretty crappy.

My focus is on the future, and getting my life in order.  Pessimistic me wants to roll my eyes but if I truly am starting this year new, then I need to believe on myself.  Again, another thing on the list to work at this year, but its not going to change over night, it takes time and hard work.  And that, I can do.

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