My Journey To a New Me

What does it take to change a life? I'm going to find out.

This week hasn’t gone the way I planned. I originally planned to put this post up on Friday, but I had a bout of food poisoning, so that plan went out the window. I am never ordering another take away pizza as long as I live. I’ll stick to making my own from now on.

I put on a pound this week, but I was expecting that due to it being my time of the month, and I can put on anything up to about five pounds because I bloat so badly. I knew going into it that I was going to put on weight, so I wasn’t upset. I was glad it was only a pound as to be perfectly honest I hadn’t been 100% on plan this week, but I’d say I’d been 90% so it wasn’t anything massive.

This week, going into week 5 hasn’t been brilliant, food poisoning is never the way I want to start my week, especially since I had to cancel my two days away after a couple of hours. Food poisoning and travelling do not mix. Trust me. I spent most of yesterday asleep instead of all the walking around I had planned so I’m going to go for a walk tomorrow to make up the difference.

Another thing that’s changing is that I made the decision, with my mum, to go back and rejoin the gym. We’re both interested in trying yoga. I want to work on my flexibility as its not as good as it should be. I can’t touch my toes, in fact, the nearest I can get is my shins and my calves absolutely scream. Also, with the gym we join, when you join, you can use the pool, the gym and do as many classes you want a week. I’m not a huge fan of swimming, I get too self conscious.

I love the gym, however and that’s my plan for right now. Building up my fitness is my main priority. I’ve never been the fittest person but with not working and going out and about, its gotten worse. When I get fitter and lose some more weight, I’m going to look at going to Zumba and body combat classes. Right now, I’m just working on slowly and surely building up my fitness by going for walks.

So, my plan for the next few days until I get weighed on Thursday is

  • Go out for a walk every day, at least half an hour.
  • Drink at least 2 litres of water a day
  • Eat more fruit and veg, think about speed food.
  • No more indulging in things that aren’t good for me.

I’m still feeling confident, I just need to go back to writing down everything I eat as I eat it, because that helps me be accountable to myself.

This morning was my week three weigh in, and I lost 3 pounds which means I’ve lost ten in three weeks. I am over the moon, I was happy with the thought I’d probably lost a pound and a half, which is generally what I’m aiming for. So to lose double that was a surprise.

This week I’ve increased my exercise, just by walking more, or when I walk going a longer route. I walked 17 miles this week, which I didn’t plan on, it just happened. I wear a fitbit and it is great for keeping track of everything for me. Walking at the minute can be a bit challenging as its been cold, snowy and slippy under foot but I persevere. I don’t think I’m ever going to be one of those people who gets up at 6am and goes for a walk with a smile on my face, but I don’t mind walking and hopefully the more weight I lose, the fitter I get, the more I’ll be able to exercise.

Both myself and my mum are doing slimming world, which has been a huge help having her there with me. At the minute we’re both considering rejoining our local gym, which is run by the council. Its £30 a month for a family group, which is 2 adults and 2 children. There are no children, so it’ll just be me and mum. Its not one of these ultra modern sleek gyms with all the fancy gadgets and high tech gear, but I wouldn’t go into those kind of gyms anyway because they’re usually filled with super fit, slim people. I’m neither slim nor particularly fit which is why my local gym fits me so well because you see a wide range of sizes of people. From the slim and fit, or ripped and fit, to people my size and larger. Its a welcoming place.

I want to up my exercise and also, having gone to the gym before whilst losing weight, I know the two in tandem can help. So, we’ll see. Maybe in a few weeks when I feel fitter. For now, I’m just going to concentrate on keeping up my walking. Its free, good for me and low impact.

I’m also pleased with my weight loss because this week proved to me that I can do things and live my life, while sticking (mostly) to plan, and still lose weight. I had a pizza last thursday, but it was the new range dominos do, which is very thin crust, light on the amount of sauce, low fat cheese and healthy toppings. Its 30 syns for a small, which for me is 2 days syns, or 15 of one day and three a day for five days depending on how I want to do it. I also went out for a meal on Sunday, with family and my friend and her son. I had a steak, baked potato and side salad. It was delicious and within plan. Then I had a ice cream. Which wasn’t on plan, but once it was done, I drew a line under it and that was it. I had it, I enjoyed it. I moved on.

I feel confident that I can keep going the way I have. I love my class, they’re all so supportive and my leader is lovely and friendly. I have a lot to lose, in all honesty, probably about eight stone (112lb/51kg) to lose, or there abouts. But for right now, I don’t look at the big picture, there’s no point. I just focus on the each 7 pound and let the big picture take care of itself. Right now, having lost 10, I have 4 pounds to my next stone mark. I have a pound and I’ll be under the next stone bracket and 9 pound to my interim target, which was 21lbs and 16 pounds to my club 10.

Feeling happy, confident and ready to tackle the next week coming.

So, I figured I would use today’s post to introduce myself properly.  Reading over the last post I realised that although I gave some information about me, I didn’t introduce myself. One, because it honestly didn’t occur to me, being totally sleep deprived and Two, blogging from my tablet is a nightmare, and I won’t be doing it again. Wow, the mobile keyboard is annoying for trying to type out posts.  I’ll stick to my laptop for blogging.   I need my qwerty keyboard.

So, introductions.  My name is Alison, I live in Scotland and I’m 37. And for as long as I can remember, I’ve thought I was fat. I remember deciding I wanted to lose weight when I was about ten. Which isn’t healthy, but my best friend was tiny and skinny, and I constantly compared myself to her. Looking back, especially at my teenage years makes me want to pull my hair out. Yes, I was curvy and maybe a stone (14lbs/6.5kg) overweight. I looked amazing and I thought I was fat because I was surrounded by people who, to me, were slimmer and prettier than me. That’s an issue I’ve dealt with my entire life and to be perfectly honest its still something I struggle with today.

But, weirdly enough, not when it comes to going to Slimming World. I don’t compare myself to everyone else in class because everyone’s journey is unique. Some only have a stone to lose, some have a lot more. I’m more on the ‘a lot more’ end of the scale but that’s okay. Rome wasn’t built in a day. I want to be at target, whatever that might be. At the moment, I have no main target, I’m just taking it seven pounds at a time.

I joined weight watchers for the first time when I was fourteen, against the wishes of my mum, but with my GP’s permission. I was too young, and it was a bad idea but trying telling any teenager who is convinced that they’re right what they’re doing is a mistake. So, after a few weeks I gave up. And over the next few years I put on a lot of weight. And I’ve spent the last twenty years trying to take it off again, with varying degrees of success.

As I said in my first post, my health issues have been my biggest struggle when it came to losing weight. Particularly my mental health because when my depression is bad, I am a comfort eater and all I want is junk. Doughnuts, crisps, chocolate, you name it, I’ll eat it. But since I’ve been on my latest anti depressants, that hasn’t been an issue. Also, with being dairy free, the amount of cakes I’m willing to eat has dropped. 90% of the dairy free cakes I’ve found have been less than tasty.

Slimming World is going great guns, I got weighed this morning and I’ve lost another 2 pounds. So I got my shiny sticker for my book, and my first half stone certificate. I am so happy with losing half a stone in two weeks. Its got me off to a great start and I feel confident about going on. I made the decision to pay for a 12 week block, which means, if I’ve paid for it, I’m going. I have no intention of giving up, this is the best I’ve felt in a long while. The next thing to do is take measurements and photos, so I can track my progress.

I set a target for losing 3 pounds this week, which feels like something I can achieve. So my aims for the week ahead are:

  • eat more fruit and veg (aka speed food)
  • drink more fluid, aim for 6 glasses a day
  • walk at least 30 mins three times this week.

All little goals, all achievable. All going to be done.

Here I am, two weeks into 2019 and almost 2 weeks into my lifestyle change.  Sounds fancier than saying trying to lose weight, but at the heart of it, that’s what I’m doing. I joined Slimming World at the start of Jan, so I’ve had one weigh in, where I lost 5lbs and I get weighed again thursday morning.  So far, this is the most positive I’ve felt because this is the easiest by far I’ve found a weight loss plan. No weighing or measuring (or, more accurately, minimal weighing and measuring), no points, no calorie counting, no disgusting shakes.  Just eating lovely food, and enjoying myself.

I’m not going to go into the plan too much because in this post, that’s not what I want to focus on.   Losing weight is one of the aims for this year, the other is to get fit and healthy.  My health at the minute isn’t brilliant,  but it could be a lot worse.  I’m waiting on an operation to remove my gallbladder and because of that, i have some dietary restrictions. No dairy, eggs or fatty meats or anything overly greasy, unless i want to spend the next few days in a lot of pain.  I also have an underactive thyroid and poly cystic ovarian syndrome, both of which make losing weight extra challenging.

The biggest struggle in my life is my mental health, which needs a seperate post to explain everything.  Right now everything is good. I’m on meds and feeling good, after a rocky year of changing my meds, and feeling overall pretty crappy.

My focus is on the future, and getting my life in order.  Pessimistic me wants to roll my eyes but if I truly am starting this year new, then I need to believe on myself.  Again, another thing on the list to work at this year, but its not going to change over night, it takes time and hard work.  And that, I can do.